There are plenty of reasons to be glad that Glee is no longer on TV. For one, if you're an artist it means Darren Criss won't absolutely eat you up on your own song anymore. However, we've attempted to answer the ultimate question: what would the Glee characters sing if the show was still airing?
Disclaimer: this list has been compiled on sheer vibes alone. Feel free to argue with it.
Rachel - ‘Becky’s So Hot’ // Fletcher
It would be perfectly in character for Rachel to sing this, probably because she was mad at Quinn or Santana for being hotter than her. It also wouldn’t be the first time she’d sung a queer song - remember when Santana came out and for some reason it was Rachel who duetted Katy Perry’s ‘I Kissed A Girl’ with her? Yeah. She would absolutely nail that final chorus though, to be fair.
Kurt - ‘Unholy’ // Sam Smith
When Kurt cheated on Blaine we got treated to what was perhaps the most hilarious segue ever. Were the reverse to happen now, Kurt’s reaction would definitely be a high camp recreation of the ‘Unholy’ music video, complete with Santana on Kim’s verse.
Blaine - ‘Late Night Talking’ // Harry Styles
The Glee club’s inevitable Harry Styles week wouldn’t be complete without Blaine’s rendition of ‘Late Night Talking’, backed up by a wall of swaying Warblers.
Mercedes - ‘Easy On Me’ // Adele
Picture the scene: it’s Diva Week, sing-off time, and Mercedes is head-to-head with Santana.
Santana - ‘Good as Hell’ // Lizzo
Picture the scene: this is what Santana sings in response to Mercedes. Both of them are incredible.
Brittany- ‘ALIEN SUPERSTAR’ // Beyoncé
The choreography would be insane. Case closed.
Quinn - ‘the 1’ // Taylor Swift
Quinn could probably recreate the entirety of the folklore and evermore catalogues as a one woman show, complete with wistful swaying and a yearning montage.
Sue - ‘The Foundations of Decay’ // My Chemical Romance
Sue once mentioned the ‘brief affair’ she had with My Chem’s drummer, and a dramatic performance of their comeback single, with cheerleaders being fired out of cannons in the background, would be very her.
Emma - ‘Running Up That Hill’ // Kate Bush
Maybe this one makes no sense, but I just think she’d kill it.
Tina - ‘This Is Why’ // Paramore
The queen of niche aesthetics, Tina would be all about the 2020-2023 emo revival. Her Hayley Williams moment would open the Glee club’s Alternative Week, which would invariably end in Mr Shue doing some unforgivable MGK cover.
Artie - ‘Ten Duel Commandments’ // Hamilton
Of course Artie would have been a Hamilton kid. He’s not really a ballad guy, though, so this feels like an appropriately rogue choice. He’ll have roped in half the football team, and knowing the Glee writers I wouldn’t be surprised if an actual duel really did go down.
Sam - ‘Bad Habits’ // Ed Sheeran
It just feels correct.
Mr Shue
Finally, Mr Shue. Hard to pin down, really. It would undoubtedly be something horrifically inappropriate for a teacher to sing in a room full of students. ‘WAP’, maybe. Or ‘Boyz’. Some more atrocious rapping. Whatever it would be, I’m eternally grateful it isn’t really airing.
Image courtesy of Laura Rivera on Unsplash. Image licence can be found here.
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